"Stand before the people you fear and speak your mind- even if your voice shakes." Maggie Kuhn.
When I first saw this quote a few months ago, it made me tremble. Since then it has been been a traveling companion to my own heart when I have needed its strength and clarity and I have shared it often with beloved friends and clients who have needed to have the courage to speak their truths to people they feared.
"Olaf and the Falling Stars" Photo by Elana Kilkenny.
One rainy summer afternoon after finding out some challenging news, I found myself in search of clarity. My energy was scattered, my heart was worried and my head felt messy. So I did what I knew to do, I couldn't unfold the big things in my life, I could only unfold that which was in front of me. So I went into our home office that had been cluttered for way too long and started clearing it out. My prayer in doing so was for my mind to be cleared out with it.
Through that process, I found in a Disney Store bag these two sippy cups. They had been given to me a while ago as a gift from my father to my children. They were of Olaf the unflaggingly optimistic, magical snowman from the movie "Frozen". I somehow resisted these cups for months, but today inexplicably I decided to wash them out and get them ready for my kids to enjoy.
In doing so, in one I found quite expectedly a piece of paper with washing and care instructions. But when I attempted to open the other sippy cup, the top was stuck. Olaf's head wouldn't budge. As I was still knee-deep in emotional muck, I found myself spewing expletives under my breath followed by a deep urge to chuck Olaf into the garbage. I was angry, why did everything feel so hard right now? Even a stupid sippy cup wouldn't open easily. I persevered and attempted to get the snowman's head off once more. Finally, his head popped off and quite unexpectedly, out flew a slew of paper stars.
They were these perfectly-shaped, delicate little stars. So small that I couldn't even imagine an origami master making them. So, I knew. They were angel made. The universe knew that I did not need one more instruction manual that day, I needed grace. And so, grace was provided. As, come to think of it, it usually is.
For sometimes grace comes in the form of stars falling out of sippy cups...
Gazing upon these fallen stars I burst into tears. I cried because I knew. Because I knew this was a message. I knew this was an answer to a prayer. I knew that I had opened up this silly cup at the perfect moment to know that I was not alone, that indeed my life and my family's life was still and would always be imbued with magic. I needed the reminder, because even those of us who speak to angels lose our way sometimes.
While the challenges that were obscuring my faith didn't go away over night and I still very humanly at times find myself dipping in and out of faith; I continue to go back to that shooting star moment. As it was one of enigmatic synchronicity. I mean really, how the hell did those stars get into that cup? Even if as part of some "Frozen" marketing magic, a few stars were slipped into some Olafs randomly, well, even the analytic side of my brain couldn't argue with the fact that the timing of these falling stars were indeed serendipitous and deeply meaningful to me.
For in that moment I knew instantly that I should indeed, still believe. Believe what I know to be true, but sometimes lose touch with feeling. Believe that help is always available. Believe that support is always there...seen and unseen. Believe that indeed peace would not only be restored but is already here if I could just trust into it.
Believe that even on a stormy day in summer, that a snowman could warm a girl's heart.
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SOME "STARS FALLING" MESSAGES FOR YOU:
*Sometimes you need to ask the universe, god, spirit (whatever feels right for you) to show you some signs.
*Be awake and present enough in your day to receive the message, sometimes they will hit you over the head even when you are sleepwalking through your day, but it helps to be available to receive the message.
*Follow that intuitive whisper that tells you to do something, go somewhere, speak to someone, etc. Messages from the universe are often subtle.
*Don't judge yourself when you are feeling bad, scared, angry. Judging how you feel only further entrenches it. Allow the feelings to move through you, but also allow some space for support to come in to shift how you feel. Ask for support and help when you feel you need it and/or when you are spiraling in your stuckness.
*When a sign comes to you, don't take it for granted. Pause, breathe in the gift of it. Allow the synchronicity, sign, moment of serendipity to shift your energy. Your present mood and resistance to feeling better might tell you to do otherwise, but choose to let grace fill-up your heart and soul. You'll be grateful that you did...
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INSPIRATIONAL BONUS CONTENT:
Spotify Playlist to Follow:
*A "Stars Falling" Music Playlist That I Made for You
LOVE TO HEAR FROM YOU:
I would love to hear about a time in your life when you experienced a synchronicity or received a sign that was particularly meaningful to you. I have found that when we share our stories we not only empower ourselves, we also help to inspire those who hear them.
Leave a comment below to share the love, as you never know who might just need to hear your story and you might just need to tell it!
I look forward to hearing from you!
Blessings and love,
Elana
"Urban Garden" Photo by Elana Kilkenny.
There are these tulips that are planted outside of the building that we live in, they came up hopefully but out of dozens of bulbs only four flowered. When we spoke to the master gardener who lives in the building next door she said it was because they were planted in the wrong season, that they had flowered once already last year and won't flower again. "Next time," she said "plant them in the autumn. If you plant them in the right season they will flourish for years to come."
I heard this and I found myself thinking about how many times we have all planted seeds for ideas in the "wrong" season only to find that they didn't come into fruition. This led me to remembering a theory I heard from master coach Tony Robbins that I often use with my Intuitive Counseling clients in sessions.
"The secret to life is threefold. It's to understand what season of life you're in, to understand what season the world is in, and to figure out how to take advantage of it." He goes on to say that it is important for each person to, "find the season they're in, which is different for everyone, and to take advantage of it. That's the secret to experiencing an extraordinary life."
We often push things to happen even though some part of us know that something feels off. Whether it's a difficult conversation you pursue with a friend even though you know they are going through a challenging time that might make them reactive rather than open to what you have to say. Or a business idea that you push while having the sense that it wasn't quite the right time for either you or in terms of the receptivity of those involved. There are countless iterations of this idea of planting in the "wrong" season.
What Season Of Life Are You In?
One way to find out what season of life you are in, is to take a cue from the animal world.
According to Jamie Sams and David Carson's enlightening
"Medicine Cards: The Discovery of Power Through the Ways of Animals,"
butterflies reflect back to us that we are always at a certain stage in our life activities. "The way to discern where you are in this cycle is to ask yourself:"
Is this the egg stage:
Is it just a thought or idea?
Is this the larva stage:
Do I need to make a decision?
Is this the cocoon stage:
Am I developing and doing something to make my idea a reality?
Is this the birth stage:
Am I sharing my completed idea
While this is a great way to tune into what stage you are in for your life as a whole or perhaps more specifically for the idea that you are cultivating, what do you do if you have already planted in the "wrong" season? I don't know anyone who hasn't had that experience in life.
Perhaps the tulips can help us out here. This past weekend one of the families in our building dug out the half sprung tulips from their beds. They prepared the soil for a different flower that we were told would grow this time of year. We did some research and decided we would order with the master gardener new tulip bulbs in the fall and plant them together in the "right season."
We went from feeling disappointed about the state of our garden and the extra work that we had to do, to feeling excited that we now have an opportunity to get to know the other families in our building and include our children in planting some brilliantly hued marigolds this spring.
I also realized that that by needing to educate ourselves in order to utilize our time and energy more effectively we have opened up a line of communication with this lovely gardener next door which has presented the opportunity for these two buildings to work together in harmony for the first time in years to make this block even more beautiful for those of us who live here and for all who walk by. It might take us another few seasons to bring our garden up to where we want it to be, but when we do, I imagine that our neighborhood relationships will be growing as well as the flowers.
Back to you.
So are you thinking that perhaps you planted in the "wrong" season? If so, first be kind to yourself. No one has impeccable timing all of the time. If the word "wrong" brings up regret or shame for you, then let go of the word (want to go deeper with letting go of shame read Dr. Brené Brown's truly brilliant book "Daring Greatly"). Beating yourself up is not only an all-too-human waste of time, it also often leads to you missing out on the benefits in your situation.
It can obviously benefit you greatly to know what season you are in and to understand the confluence of how that relates to the season the world around you is in as it relates to what you want to plant. However, I truly believe that there is always something to be gleaned from all experiences.
Just like we discovered in this chapter with our building's garden, there are always "hidden gifts" to planting seeds in the "wrong season". Think about what you learned from your own equivalent experience and apply that newly gained wisdom to your present and future. Then perhaps meditate on whether you are in an egg, larva, cocoon or birth stage in a life activity that is important to you. Once you know what stage you are in, your decisions about how to proceed will be clearer.
The difference between disappointment and opportunity is your perception of the situation, choosing to be loving to yourself in the process, and being creatively open to how you can grow and flourish in this season of your life...right here...right now.
"Beauty Within the Frost" Photo by Elana Kilkenny.
It was a late autumn day all the trees lay barren, a reflection of their current wintry state, alone amidst the fallen landscape stood a tree aglow in vibrant fiery lushness. Radiant, bejeweled with orange leaves and a perfect undercoat of yellow. Harried New Yorkers stopped dead in their tracks spellbound by their rare beauty. Strangers unfolded stream of consciousness utterings to one another..."Wow", "Well isn't that just magical" and "Miraculous." The New York City perpetual ticking clock stopped for a moment and we all paused spellbound to drink in the beauty.
We are now in the heart of winter, I pass by this tree every day as I bring my daughter to school. Its branches are now bare like their companions. But burned into my memory is an overlay of its autumnal incandescent glow. On certain days I could swear I see the halo of burnt sienna leaves adorning its limbs. And I am reminded that there is always beauty within the frost.
As we rush, as we bundle up, as we dream of spring wildflowers in bloom and a whisper of a spring jacket...we are beckoned to remember that change is inevitable and yet so much remains innate. The beauty that resides in you, in each of us, is immutable. It may radiate more in certain seasons of our lives, it may deepen with the bloom of requited desire and fluid moments of grace but even in the days of our winter's darkness the aura of our heart's luminosity is always present.
So today as you roll out of bed, engage in the world, dance with your muse...breathe in beyond your resistance, beyond your slushy winter boots, beyond your old stories that fool you into believing that your finest days are behind you and touch that which the frost protects...that which is your radiant self.
For more of my February Newsletter dedicated to the subject of love click here to read more...
"It was sign." "I thought I followed the signs but why did I end up where I did?" "What do these signs in my life actually mean?" These are snapshots of conversations I have had over the years with my Intuitive Counseling clients and have overheard a myriad of times in passing.
As it is often more powerful to illuminate a broad topic with a specific example and then go broader, Tania Van Pelt and I made for you a video for her illuminating website Happiness Series where we discuss "Intuition, Signs & Expectations" using some specific examples. One of the clearest takeaways from this discussion was that expectations and signs don't "mix well" at all. In fact, expectations often get in the way of the natural momentum and direction that the signs of our life are trying to take us in.
Whether you are a believer in synchronicities, signs and its ilk or not, you will garner wisdom from this video as we speak about a type of experience that is common to all of us in one way or another. We often go in a direction in our lives feeling that we are somehow being led on a path only to find out that the process and the outcome is very different than we anticipated...and then what?
Watch the video below and enjoy! Share the wisdom and love, please share this video with all those you feel would benefit! I would love to hear from you about your own experiences with intuition, signs and expectations so please leave a comment below on the blog or underneath the video on YouTube!
"If we miss the moment, we miss the clues. In the present, when we allow ourselves to fully live there, we are restored, made wiser, made deeper and happier." Marianne Williamson (via: www.oprah.com)
Is the velocity of life feeling too fast for you? Like a train speeding toward a destination, there is so much to get accomplished within a small window of time. While this time of year can be particularly busy, if you were to take a moment to pause and take stock you might realize that the pace of your life in general is such that it can contribute to a sense of disconnection. Disconnection from yourself, loved ones, your children, spiritual connection, etc.
The uplifting news is that alongside all the ways in which you may feel disconnected that there are just as many anecdotes available to you right now that will assist you to feel a deeper sense of connection. Over the course of many sessions with my Intuitive Counseling and Feng Shui clients and my own experience, I have distilled a number of practices that can assist you to feel more connected. This in turn can create a ripple effect in your life of opening up your heart and life to even more joy, peace, and possibilities. In conjunction with the inspiring wellness website Happiness Series, I created a video that offers you two very effective and accessible ways to feel a deeper sense of connection in your life.
I would love to hear from you on which tip resonates with you the most. Do you have any suggestions on how you create more connection in your life? Leave them in the comments area below and share the love!
Watch...Enjoy...Share...Comment...Put Into Action...
P.S. For more inspirational and empowering videos in my series with Happiness Series, please click here.
"We forget we're mostly water til the rain falls and every atom in our body starts to go home." Albert Huffstickler (via Arianna Huffington from "Thrive")
Blessings and love,
Elana
Hello beloved all,
This has been a very full autumn for many of us. I have heard from many of you that there have been a lot of changes happening in your life and loved ones just over the past few months. That coupled with generally fuller schedules this time of year, has resulted in your feeling more overwhelmed or anxious. You might have even been told by those around us to "just calm down."
Many of us are not sure what to do when we hear that or how to actually "just calm down". So as an anecdote to feeling so frenzied I created a video for you on "How to Calm Down" in partnership with the wonderful website Happiness Series http://happinessseries.com/. Hopefully watching it will give you some insight on how to calm down and also on why we often we react so badly when people tell us to "just calm down".
Watch the video below...enjoy...and please leave a comment here or below the video on YouTube. I would love to hear from you about where you are struggling with this so that I can be of more service to you in future videos!
Hi beloved all,
I am thrilled to share with you all the first in a series of videos I am doing in conjunction with the wonderful website http://happinessseries.com/. So often in life and books these days we have been hearing certain catch-all spiritual phrases such as just "get grounded" or "manifestation" or "abundance." When I am working with clients I find that while these concepts sound appealing, most people don't really know what they really mean and how to apply it to their every day lives. With this is mind, my first video for Happiness Series focuses on the idea of "Getting Grounded". What does this mean in real life in terms of grounding your energy and also what does it mean in the area of money?
Stay tuned for more inspirational and practical videos in our series over the next few months as well as upcoming articles I am writing as a blog writer for http://happinessseries.com/! If you like what you see, please leave me a comment below I would love to hear from you!
Watch...Apply...Share!
Blessings,
Elana
"Rainbows Over Manhattan" Photo by Elana Kilkenny.
I feel somehow that Nora Ephron is woven inexorably into the tapestry of my living in this city that I love so profoundly. When I was a college senior I moved into a tiny, slightly decrepit one bedroom apartment in the boondocks section of the Upper East Side. There was scarcely a thing about that particular neighborhood or apartment that felt like me, but on my second night there I went to see "Sleepless in Seattle" in a local movie theater and it hit me...I was living my childhood dream of calling New York City my home. So my apartment was still just an apartment, but I was now at home in New York City.
Years later when I was in my mid-twenties, I found myself blessed enough to buy a one bedroom apartment in my beloved city. And although I had barely spent a minute in all my years in Manhattan on the Upper West Side, somehow my vision of living in New York City was shaped by my adoration of Woody Allen movies and my hundredth viewing of "When Harry Met Sally". My home for fourteen years was in the West 70's and close to Riverside Park. I spent countless strolls passing by the storied Apthorp building. And when I did, I would always look into the courtyard from the street and daydream of all the magical people I imagined lived there. Never realizing at the time that Ms. Ephron was one of those very people.
Years later, I found through a series of synchronicities Nora Ephron's famous love letter in The New Yorker to her apartment in the Apthorp. Somewhere in this timeline, my dear friend Alex D. invited me to the New York premier of "You've Got Mail" and I found myself living out another childhood dream torn from the pages of "The Mixed Up Files of Mrs. Basil E. Frankweiler" of being inside The Natural History Museum after hour. Underneath the iconic blue whale stood both Meg Ryan and Tom Hanks who I adore, but it was Ms. Ephron that I was longing to speak to but too shy to approach. No small violins are playing here though, as in that inevitable way that life presents us all with our own full-circle story arcs, I had my opportunity years later to speak with her under much more meaningful circumstances.
So at this point in my own story, here is my love letter to Ms. Ephron that I posted in the wake of her recent passing:
"I will always remember Nora Ephron, not just because I loved her humor and her movies, but because she obsessively loved her Upper West Side apartment in the Apthorp and her article in The New Yorker about letting it go helped me to let go of my own apartment on the UPW that I was obsessively attached to. I loved her because when I was pregnant with my second child, and my aforementioned beloved home was in contract to be sold, I found myself sitting behind her in a movie theater and mustered up the courage to thank her for her Apthorp article. I told her of my heartache in moving and she turned around to me and put her hand on my arm and looked me squarely in the eyes as she said, 'You will feel so stupid that you ever worried about leaving...'
And it being Nora Ephron, it was said with the perfect mix of tenderness, tough love, perspective and emphasis. And of course, as I sit here looking out my window of my new home where I am greeted by rainbows, fireworks, and all the phases of the moon...I know she was right."
With deep abiding gratitude and love,
Elana
Photo by Elana Kilkenny. Taken at ABC Carpet and Home.
"This year will bring whatever this year brings, but what you bring TO it will make all the difference" Marianne Williamson
Dear Friends,
It has been a while since I have written to you and I am thrilled to reconnect to you. As I wrote about in my most recent newsletter (see link in my "Read My January 2011" post) what will elevate this new year from a time of intention to fruition is what you will bring to this year. This is an opportune time to get clearer about what you want to create and to be fearless in moving toward that vision. As we continue to live in a time where that which is hidden and a hindrance to our fullest expression is no longer supported, it is wise to recognize that if obstacles are coming up for you they are probably doing so that you can be clearer and more receptive to experiencing a deeper level of joy and manifestation that perhaps has eluded you in previous years.
I have heard from so many people how already in these early days of the new year one of two things seem to be happening, a tremendous amount of challenges seem to be coming up all at once or amazing breakthroughs and alignment is taking place.
Wherever you fall in this spectrum I urge you to have faith and not judge but rather be clear that both seemingly opposite experiences are connected. So much this year will be about completion. So wherever you have been stuck, perhaps for a very long time, might come up strongly for you this year so that you can choose to release these patterns more completely. While it could be incredibly tempting to allow yourself to spiral into old patterns of scarcity and fear, it might help to recognize that perhaps what is presenting itself has been keeping you from experiencing more flow, love, joy, in your life and that it just might be presenting itself now so that you can approach it differently and truly move beyond it.
Even at times in my own life where I have felt overwhelmed, I have found that it is important to be a "good parent" to your thinking and literally stop yourself from going deeper into negative thoughts. One way I have found that it powerful to start turning the tide is to find a balance between connecting to some authentic sweetness in life while also honoring my shadow side. Sometimes you need to start shifting your perspective by going to a place of gratitude, as this brings some necessary sweetness to an experience that might feel bitter.
Even if in the moment you can only access a few things (or even one thing, start somewhere) that you are grateful for, it is a powerful practice to shift your mind to gratitude as it also opens your heart and creates more space for something more positive to take root. Instead of repressing what is upsetting you, journaling is often a powerful tool. I would suggest always having a balance between expressing what is bothering you and having some practice that adds energy to the sweetness of your life.
While this tool has been around for a long time, Julia Cameron's "The Artist's Way" to be one of the most transformative tools I have ever come across to move beyond "stuckness", fear and sadness. While it is a great book for artists of all natures, don't let the title fool you it is potent for anyone wanting to be in better flow and manifestation in your life.
Sometimes we all need a little assistance to get clearer and receive support to move into a more peaceful and abundant place in our lives. In this spirit, I am offering new sessions and workshops to empower, awaken and inspire you to live your most essential life. In addition to these new offerings, I also want to share a few of my favorite resources with you that can help you to bring more to this new year! More to come in the upcoming weeks and months...
My Session Offerings:
*Intuitive Counseling Hour and a Half Sessions
My signature hour and a half Intuitive Counseling sessions offer you greater personal insight and energy to create and manifest your empowered vision for yourself. Theseguided sessions offer you intuitive and practical guidance that does not center on predictions, although they can be a part of the process. These sessions assist you to build a stronger connection to your own intuition and creative possibility.
During this time where even the support we seek is often rushed, these session's length offers you the time to deeply explore where you are today and helps you to manifest a more fulfilling present and future. You will receive tangible suggestions to pro-actively assist you to move through the obstacles that are challenging you. These sessions also provide an energetic experience that is both nurturing and inspiring.
*NEW: Intuitive Counseling One Hour Sessions
Many of you have expressed interest in receiving support on a more consistent basis (weekly, monthly, etc.) to help you focus on specific areas of your life and/or business. In response to these requests I am happy to announce that I am now offering one hour sessions to meet your needs.
These sessions offer you powerful guidance and tools to empower you and assist you in times of personal or professional challenge, transition, or growth. I will provide you with clear suggestions on what can best assist you to authentically move through pain, obstacles and confusion to a place of more peace, empowerment and manifestation!
*Couples Sessions
These hour and a half sessions are meant for all relationships whether romantic, professional or familial. I will guide you together to attain more clarity, direction, and tools on how to connect more authentically, peacefully and joyfully to one another.Whether you need assistance with obstacles that are facing you in your relationship or simply would like to go to another level in your relationship, couples sessions offer you a safe and powerful opportunity to receive the support that is most beneficial for you.
*Intuitive Feng Shui Home & Office Consultations
These consultations offer a personalized, intuitive and transformational approach that assists you in the creation of home and business environments designed to fully support your personal and professional goals.
I will help you arrange, decorate and revitalize your home, office, indoor and outdoor spaces so that your life is more harmonious and your dreams more fully realized. While classically trained in Feng Shui, my unique approach is anything but traditional. IntuitiveInteriors consultations synthesize a combination of psychic information, Feng Shui techniques, and interior design sensibility.
*Host a Workshop...
I am thrilled to offer private workshops in the comfort and convenience of your own home or office. These workshops are all psychically guided and can be customized on a specific theme that would resonate with you and your friends, family, and/or colleagues.
Workshops are offered on a range of subjects such as: Creating the Year of Your Dreams; Opening to Love: Bringing in and Connecting Deeper to Love; Intuitive Parenting; Creating a Beautiful and Transformational Home, Work Environments that Inspire and Motivate...and much more.
Workshops are available both for individuals as well as specifically designed for couples. To hosta workshop that inspires you or for more information, please contact Elana by email at elanakilkenny@yahoo.com or by phone at 877-858-2100.
*Book a Session
Sessions for all of Elana's services are available in-person and over the phone. If you would like to book a session or for more information please contact Elana by email at info@elanakilkenny.com or by phone at 877-858-2100.
Inspirational Books For The New Year:
1)"A Return to Love" by Marianne Williamson. This is truly one of the most powerful and profound books I have ever read. I strongly suggest reading this book and once you have I have often found it to be very helpful to open this book randomly when a question is presenting itselfand as a way to ask for guidance on a particular subject. http://www.marianne.com/
2)"Creating the Work You Love" by Rick Jarow. Rick puts it best: "Now is the time to honor your life’s calling and create a self-sustaining career that resonates with your deepest levels of integrity, passion, and purpose" Rick is truly a profound teacher, author and counselor. www.rickjarow.com
3)"The Artist's Way" by Julia Cameron. http://www.theartistsway.com/
4)"Ask and it is Given: Learning to Manifest Your Desires" by Esther and Jerry Hicks http://www.abraham-hicks.com/lawofattractionsource/index.php
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